Episodes
Tractoring
Jeremy Clarkson embarks on his path towards muddy misery and potential ruin by running his own farm.
Sheeping
Jeremy decides to get a flock of sheep, not realising the added complications these high-maintenance animals will bring.
Shopping
Jeremy Clarkson decides to open a farm shop to sell his own produce. This sounds like it should be easy. It isn't.
Wilding
Jeremy Clarkson decides to become a naturalist.
Pan (dem) icking
As Covid-19 puts Britain on lockdown, Jeremy suddenly finds that his biggest worries aren't all related to the upcoming lambing season.
Melting
Jeremy discovers why British farmers are always complaining about the weather. It's mostly because it never does what they want it to do.
Fluffing
As the drought drags on and the harvest time gets closer, Jeremy and his motley crew have a fearsome list of jobs to complete.
Harvesting
After months of hard work Clarkson's farm arrives at a make or break moment; harvest time.
Surviving
Jeremy Clarkson sets out to diversify, as a way of increasing his annual profit (£144 last year).
Cowering
Jeremy's new herd of cows settle in, but soon reject the fence that keeps them in.
Schmoozing
Faced with Council powers that be, Jeremy uses two of his greatest skills: diplomacy and respect for red tape.
Badgering
Jeremy Clarkson comes face to face with his nemesis: the badger.
Council-ing
The day of the Council's decision on Jeremy's restaurant arrives.
Counselling
The fall-out from the Council's decision continues to fall out.
Scheming
Jeremy's restaurant idea is re-born, and there's not a moment to waste.
Climaxing
Secret preparations accelerate for the opening of Jeremy's restaurant.
Unfarming
We return to Diddly Squat to find the farm in turmoil. The Council has shut down the restaurant, the weather is making planting crops impossible and costs are on the up. Jeremy needs to formulate a new plan to get his farm through the year.
Porking
Jeremy sets to work getting the farm ready for its newest residents, some Sand and Black pigs. Meanwhile Kaleb is annoyed when he spots someone else drilling in his fields.
Jobbing
It's Christmas time on the farm and Kaleb gives Jeremy a festive surprise. However their relationship becomes strained as they bicker while getting on with the farms winter jobs.
Harrowing
Jeremy treats Kaleb to something he hopes will help with his farming, and Lisa and Jeremy discover just how tough being pig farmers can be.
Healing
Spring has sprung and rejuvinated Jeremy's farming the unfarmed idea, as he takes on multiple new projects to try and turn a profit from his unused land.. And there are some one week old arrivals to the farm to lift everyone's spirits.
Mushrooming
Jeremy's mushroom empire begins to appear all consuming as he struggles to keep on top of his newest venture and Kaleb and Charlie are off to London for a very important meeting.
Parking
Team Diddly assemble for a much needed building project and Jeremy brings in the Chairman of the British Deer Society to help with the deer management issues on the farm.
Calculating
Harvest time arrives and is tenser than ever, as Jeremy and Kaleb find out how profitable both Jeremy's new projects and Kaleb's arable farming have been this year.
Solo-ing
Kaleb and Lisa are both away and Jeremy has been left to run the farm on his own. Help is soon needed, and the arrival of a new farmhand to ease the burden gives Jeremy space for some strategic thinking.
Pubbing
Jeremy has found a promising pub, Diddly Squat’s newest arrival teaches him a thing or two about farming, and the ageing Lamborghini has competition.
Crawling
Relentless wet weather puts the crop planting in crisis, Kaleb returns to find another farmer on his patch, and while his pub search continues, in an effort to dry the soil Jeremy gets to grips with a new piece of kit.
Cottaging
There’s a big new arrival at the farm, a much smaller one down in the pig pens, and it looks as though the pub search might finally be over.
Endgaming
It’s the middle of May, the livestock are heading out to graze, and while the goats are going high-tech, the cows are getting a bull-friend. If only progress with the pub was as positive.
Splurging
With his pub plan finally taking shape, Jeremy heads to his first cattle market to buy up some beef. But calling in the experts to help get the pub off the ground, Jeremy soon discovers the costs are only just beginning.
Hurrying
A diary cock-up turns the pub into a pressure cooker, and the start of the harvest runs Jeremy ragged. Team Diddly Squat will have to dig deep to get both across the line.
Landlording
It’s bank holiday weekend and the pub opens for business. Whether it stays open for business is another matter. Back at Diddly Squat, the harvest results come in and the curtain falls on another farming year.
Operating
A health scare sees Jeremy looking for ways to make life at Diddly Squat less stressful. A new breed of sheep might help, but his new pub might not.
Storming
Jeremy hatches a plan for the pub's first festive season, kicking off in style when the Farmer's Dog hosts a gig by one of Ireland's biggest bands. Elsewhere, farmers from across the UK gather to protest the government's latest tax hikes.
Tripping
It's the new year and Jeremy decides Diddly Squat needs a bold new direction. Diving headlong into the world of high-tech farming, he takes Kaleb on his first ever trip abroad to find out how it's done.
Updating
Autonomous farming arrives at Diddly Squat. Which is just as well, because there are problems at the pub, and with the pigs.
Decapitating
Diddly Squat 2.0 continues to take shape with a new farm office and the arrival of a droid. The snails, meanwhile, have been getting along famously, and the cows are due to give birth any day.
Frazzling
Diddly Squat is basking in a sunny spell. There're baby animals aplenty, the high-tech crops are coming along nicely and there's a big night at the pub to look forward to. The only question is, when does a sunny spell become a drought?
Sickening
Jeremy busies himself with a project close to his heart, inviting over a local birdlife expert to offer advice on how Diddly Squat can be more friendly to its winged residents. And while things get heated when that advice clashes Kaleb's tried-and-tested farming ways, all is soon forgotten when - with the harvest looming - the farm is rocked by some devastating news.
Reaping
With the farm still reeling from its shock TB diagnosis, there's no time to dwell as the harvest arrives. This year's will be like no other, and only once the results are in can the Diddly Squat family take stock of this rollercoaster of a farming year.
Cast
Jeremy Clarkson
Self - Host
Kaleb Cooper
Self - Farmer
Charlie Ireland
Self - Land Agent
Lisa Hogan
Self
Gerald Cooper
Self
Crew
Peter Richardson
Producer
Peter Fincham
Executive Producer
Andy Wilman
Executive Producer
Zoe Brewer
Executive Producer
Nick Dalton
Editor
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